From a treadmill to Kipling and ‘If’

Returning to yesterday’s theme of word association, how about “treadmill”? For some it conjures up the daily grind of a monotonous job, or handling the chores of a demanding family. The literary minded might think of Oscar Wilde and his time on the treadmills of Reading gaol, which destroyed his health and led to his early death “beyond his means”.

If you are into keeping your body in shape, today the treadmill is the exercise machine that has replaced jogging for many. Jogging these days is not a high priority for fitness addicts in Panama. With increasing robberies and violent crime, plus the disappearance of the jogging strip along large sections of Avenida Balboa, it’s safer and easier to work out closer to home.

The problem with the machine is that it is boring. When you jog there are things to be seen, other addicts to greet or ignore, especially if they streak past you as you lumber along the sidewalk.

The treadmills in the bigger gyms do offer some diversion. There are those svelte ladies who pound away, heads high, arms swinging, drawing envious, jealous, or lustful gazes. Where do they get their energy? Or, if you are a female, there are role models for over-paunched husbands.. bronzed Arnold Schwarzeneger Jnr types who obviously have no jobs, as they are always working some fitness machine, whatever time you drop by.

I am blessed, or cursed, depending on the mood, with a gym in my apartment building where using the treadmill is a lonely and boring experience, so it gives the mind time to wander.

Yesterday, as I slugged along thoughts centered on Kipling’s “If”, which at one time hung on the walls of homes around the world. Now Kipling was tarred by many as a racist for his “white man’s burden” diatribe, and his poem “If” was written as a tribute to the ambitious Dr Jamieson, whose famous raid led to the South African (Boer) War and the British invention of concentration camps.

But take away the imperialist jingoistic background, and If still resonates with some genuine pieces of wisdom.

On the treadmill, as I hovered somewhere between five and six kilometers “ If you can fill the unforgiving minute, with sixty seconds worth of distance run” came to mind.

From there it was an easy step to apply some of the Nobel Laureate’s homilies to local events:

For problem plagued Martin Torrijos: “ If you can keep your head, when all about you/ Are losing theirs and blaming it on you.”

Those leaving office richer than when they arrived: “If you can make a heap of all your winnings”

Ex president Ernesto Perez Balladares: “If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you”

Victims of the bus and diethelyne glycol disasters still looking for compensation: ”If you can wait and not be tired by waiting.”

Mayoral candidate Miguel Antonio Bernal:

“If you can dream and not make dreams your master. ”

Presidential candidate Balbina Hererra:

“ If you can meet with triumph and disaster/ And treat those two imposters just the same.”

Running mate Juan Carlos Navarro:

“Don’t look too good, nor talk too wise. ”