Letters from local friends

Phil, I'm a little confused, let me see if I have this straight. If you grow up in Hawaii, raised by your grandparents, you’re “exotic, “different;” grow up in Alaska eating moose burgers, you’re a quintessential American story. If your name is Barack you're a radical, unpatriotic Muslim; name your kids Willow, Trig and Track, you're a maverick. Graduate from Harvard law School and you are unstable; attend 5 different small colleges before graduating, you're well grounded.

If you spend 3 years as a respected community organizer, become the first black President of the Harvard Law Review, create a voter registration drive that registers 150,000 new voters, spend 12 years as a Constitutional Law professor, spend 8 years as a State Senator representing over 750,000 people, become chairman of the state Senate's Health and Human Services committee, spend 4 years in the United States Senate representing a state of 13 million people while sponsoring 131 bills and serving on the Foreign Affairs, Environment and Public Works and Veteran's Affairs committees, you don't have any real leadership experience.

On the other hand, if your total resume is: local weather girl, 4 years on the city council and 6 years as the mayor of a town with less than 7,000 people, 20 months as the governor of a state with only 650,000 people, then you're qualified to become the country's second highest ranking executive.

If you have been married to the same woman for 19 years while raising 2 daughters, all within Protestant churches, you're not a real Christian; if you cheated on your first wife with a rich heiress, and left your disfigured wife and married the heiress the next month, you're a Christian.

If you teach responsible, age appropriate sex education, including the proper use of birth control, you are eroding the fiber of society; but if, while governor, you staunchly advocate abstinence only, with no other option in sex education in your state's school system while your unwed teen daughter ends up pregnant, you're very responsible.

If your wife is a Harvard graduate lawyer who gave up a position in a prestigious law firm to work for the betterment of her inner city community, then gave that up to raise a family, your family's values don't represent America's; however, if your husband is nicknamed "First Dude", with at least one DWI conviction and no college education, who didn't register to vote until age 25 and once was a member of a group that advocated Alaska’s secession from the USA, your family is extremely admirable. OK, much clearer now.”

THERE’S NO SUCH THING AS A ‘FREE LUNCH’.Karen feels the pensionado/jubilado discounts (25% off restaurant meals; 15 perc off at fast-food restaurants) given to diners is unfair because it inflates prices across the board and forces others who don’t have such privileges to pay higher prices. Furthermore, she says restaurateurs lose money in the way the discount is applied.

I agree the discount is unfair and is inflationary, but if life were fair, Karen, O.J. would be bunking with Bubba in federal prison (he may still make it). I accept the reduced bill and give the savings as a tip. I don’t see the practice disappearing any time soon. No more than senior citizen express lines at banks and government offices will be closed down. Sure, they do cause younger clients to wait longer in line. And, maybe an argument could be made that us older codgers have more time to waste than young working customers. But it will never happen.

MEET THE AMERICAN AMBASSADOR.Ticket sales for the September 30th cocktail to meet the new American Ambassador are going fairly well. Sponsored by the American Society, the $35 ($40 for non-members) event will be at 7 PM at Marriott’s Campo Alegre hall. It is open to everyone.

CANADIAN THANKSGIVING DINNERThe Canadian Association of Panama has sold over half the available tickets for its October 10th (Friday) Thanksgiving dinner fundraiser for Achutupu’s school programs. If you have a hankering for three varieties of Australian wines, early turkey, Kuna music and dancing, or just want to practice your Canadian (eh!) and French (“j’ai mon voyage”) come on down. The event is at the Miramar Hotel at 7 p.m. Tickets cost $50 and can be bought at the Exedra bookstore.